Are you ready for some Sunday night Game of Thrones? It’s the Snow Bowl and two bastards are about to meet on the field to see who really wants Winterfell. Following are some of my predictions for tomorrow night’s episode. If you’re not totally caught up there will definitely be some spoilers. If you don’t want your pristine mental palate tainted by my heretic assumptions you should stop reading as well.

Prediction 1: It’s all about the North.

As the name suggests, I think the entire episode will be devoted to the rumble up north. We’ll find out what’s happening in King’s Landing and Meereen and Braavos in the season finale, which is of course coming far too quickly, this one has some stuff to settle.

Prediction 2: Knights of the Vale are going to show up.

A redditor pretty much confirmed what most of us already assumed: Sansa is asking Littlefinger to bring the Knights of the Vale to help. I’m betting they’ll show up just in time to turn the tide of the battle in the Starks’ favor. D&D can’t resist falling back on a dues ex machina.

Prediction 3: Someone we love will die.

Because this is Westeros and that’s how it works. I don’t think Jon is going down. It’s basically confirmed as canon now that Jon is a Targaryen and what’s the point of hanging on to someone that could pose real threat to Dany’s claim to the throne, especially since his Stark blood could help him really unite the North with the Seven Kingdoms again, just to have him killed off by a psychopathic douche lord? No, I think we’re going to lose Tormund (NNNNNNOOOOO, not Brimund! Torienne! Mr. Brienne of Tarth!) or Davos. They’re both well liked, they’ve both served their purpose – Tormund kept the Wildings loyalty with Jon and Davos kept the Red Woman around to revive Jon and also brought Lady Bear on board – and we all know what happens to decent characters once they’ve fulfilled their position as a convenient plot vehicle. Convenient emotional manipulation!

Ramsay Bolton is totally going down though, the North isn’t big enough for both bastards. I hope it’s Sansa that drives a sword through his face.

Prediction 4: Some northern lords are going to peel away from the Boltons as the battle goes on.

I’m looking at you, Smalljon. Though I hope House Umbers crumbles under the weight of the Wildlings for what he did to Shaggy Dog. I think Ramsay is just going to do some crazy awful stuff in battle, like flinging small children in catapults at the enemy, and that’s going to make less crazy people, like the Carstarks, question their allegiances.

Prediction 5: This isn’t going to go the way we hope or think.

Maybe it’s Jon that will die. Maybe Littlefinger will be a sissy about being rebuked by Sansa before and not answer her raven and leave their tiny army flailing in the snow like Stannis’. Maybe this is as much the end of the Starks as it was the Baratheons. Maybe Jon Snow was brought back to life at the beginning of this season just to be cruelly killed off again, permanently, at the end. Jon Snow says in the trailer he doesn’t want to come back again. This is Game of Thrones, we’re so used to things going so awfully why should we expect anything decent to happen? Maybe that’s exactly why we should.

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